I hope you will all forgive me if I have been quiet or not quite seemed myself lately. You see, I am living with a pain attack. My doctor and I are in the process of figuring out what it is. So far, we have eliminated thyroid, blood sugar, infection, and cancer. Still potentially on the table is auto-immune disorders, though I would have to be what they call subclinical (that is, the blood tests do not show certain types of activities). My personal pet theory is Sjogren’s syndrome, which is a type of auto-immune disorder.
It hurts. I type in short bursts because it quickly becomes too painful for me to type. It makes me very grateful that I type extraordinarily quickly, else I fear I would never get a chance to say anything. My hands feel like someone stepped on them, or like I missed a nail and hit myself with the hammer, that kind of intense but dull aching. My feet are so tender that some nights, standing long enough to feed Hudson is a torment, with much the same kind of pain.. I am swollen and having pins-and-needles sensations in my hands and feet, and sometimes into the forearms and the lower legs. I think it is also attacking my bad knee and bad hip. My hip feels like there is a jagged shard of pain stabbed into me, and not only does it hurt where it is lodged, the pain is seeping into the general vicinity.
I am upset, and a little scared. There are other symptoms that may be related that started a little earlier. My memory is terribly interrupted, and I cannot remember things that I normally would remember with great clarity. My mouth and eyes are painfully dry, but my throat is full of thick mucus, which sometimes gives me a little trouble with breathing. I am having lower GI pain and other troubles that may be related to all of this.
In three weeks I see a rheumatologist. In the meantime, I will be talking to my doctor in the hopes of trying something like steroids in the short term to help with all of this pain.
I suppose what this all adds up to is that I feel lousy and I hope you will all keep me in your thoughts.